British Empire Union World War I poster from 1918, titled “Once a German—always a German!” (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
After the recent exit from the Empire – dubbed Crexit – British steampunks have remained terribly polite to people from the commonwealth countries who are residing in Britain, it’s been revealed.
Speaking from an unknown location, Lady Emilia Von Poppetart said “We’ve been monitoring a parallel universe where the people of Great Britain have voted to leave a similar ‘European Union’ and have taken the opportunity to be racist, xenophobic and just downright rude to people that they had no personal issue with before the vote, and who they also know nothing about regarding their personal lives or why they’re there in the first place.” After some investigation, Lady Poppetart and her research team discovered that the discovery of a new form of propulsion and the radical development of new technology has produced lazy, self righteous people who think that because they have a historical link to Britain that they can tell anyone else to leave the country.
“We think that because there is so much technology in this world that will do many tasks on your behalf, these people have grown to believe – rather naively – that machines clean their toilets, sweep their floors and pick their fruit. They can’t accept that it’s thousands of workers from Eastern Europe who have a hard working attitude that are actually doing this work for them.”
It has been confirmed that, should all those people decide to leave, the country’s economy will collapse because the people who criticise those doing these jobs aren’t actually willing to do the jobs themselves because they’re “beneath them”. They also complain that there are no jobs available.
“These people are the worst, it would seem. We’ve discovered by analysing the electrocommunication systems in that universe, that some of the people who voted to leave this Union of European countries did so for noble reasons, but there are a small minority who voted to leave because they actually don’t like people who have a different skin colour. We’re conducting experiments now, but so far our data hasn’t uncovered a reason as to why that’s an important factor. We’ve also failed to work out how it’s important that only white people or those born in Britain should be allowed more rights than other people who are there to work hard and contribute to the economy and society as a whole.”
Thankfully back in this universe, despite the Empire on the brink of breaking apart, the British steampunks have been terribly polite to anyone and everyone living in Britain; regardless of their country of origin, skin colour or whether they’re male or female.
A typical response we received when we revealed the results to ladies and gentlemen in the street about what is happening in this oilpunk universe was:“They do what?”
Other responses included: “How could they be so thoughtless?”, “Don’t they care about anyone?” and “What the Hell is wrong with them?”